Notes on A Primordial Place

I allowed some determined and ungovernable part of me to rework reality. On my page, bioregional characteristics, identifiable as Torrey Pine Reserve, evolved into a world with its own reality. I called that world A Primordial Place before I understood the meanings and implications of such a title.

In truth, it took a long time for the paintings to open up and show me their otherworldly and primordial potency. My limited use of color helped to create that interpretation. It made the scenes look like they existed in a separate reality and offered an apprehension of deep time. And because the images had such a full, rich and soupy potential, I saw what Merleau-Ponty imagined: “that primordial layer at which both things and ideas come into being.”

I also saw how motion and emotion had been contained on my page, and was surprised to find silence trapped within that container. The silence felt primordial and compelling. I found myself wanting to stare at, and into, the unknowable nature of things.

In the end, my paintings felt like a small contribution to the mysterium tremendum. I was an artist looking everywhere for awe, wonder, and transcendent moments. Typically, I found those kinds of experiences in natural settings but sometimes I felt taken by the mysteries on my own page.